Adopting Fatherhood

Adopting a child from foster care isn't for everyone.  The process can take forever, the paperwork can seem endless and the questions you get from people are off-the-wall at best.  For the 20,000 children that AdoptUSKids.org has helped place, I'm glad they now have adoptive parents that are willing to work through the process to give them a loving home.  If you are considering becoming an adoptive parent, please ask people who have gone through the process before you make your final decision.  Our perspectives may just surprise you.  For children in foster care available for adoption, and for whom no adoptive family has been identified, AdoptUSKids.org serves as a tool for connecting their caseworkers with prospective adoptive families. Over the last decade, 20,000 children previously photolisted on the website have been placed with adoptive families. AdoptUSKids is a service of the U.S. Department of Health and Human Services and Administration for Childre...

The Kid and her Great Grandma celebrating together Today was the final court hearing in our adoption of The Kid. The hearing itself was anti-climatic, yet important because it was the legal confirmation of what Gladys and I have known for months, The Kid is our daughter. A year ago, this was all still a dream of sorts. We had just filed our paperwork with Catholic Social Services of Wayne County to become foster parents, because we were advised by a few adoptive parents that if we wanted a child under 3, our best option was to become foster parents with the intent of adoption. Just a few weeks later, we received a phone call from a case worker asking if we were willing to skip the foster process and become adoptive parents instead.  Gladys nor I had any idea that eleven months later, we would be finalizing our adoption on my grandmother's birthday with my grandmother. During the last twelve months, I have lost more sleep than I can keep track of, I have cried more than I t...

There is a little boy at daycare that loves The Kid.  Every morning, he runs over to her to pat her on the head, then follows her around the room like a lost little puppy.  When she has enough, she pushes him away.    I have joked with the staff in her daycare room that I'm going to start looking for convents for her soon. So when this little boy started pursuing her, the staff told Gladys about it and joked that they better not tell me or I'll send her to a convent for sure.    Now, he is a nice kid.  He's very polite, quick with a wave hello and goodbye whenever he sees me.  He pats The Kid gently on her head as a standard greeting.  He's about the same age, he lets her do most of the talking and seems to hang on her every word.  In short, if he keeps this behavior up around my daughter for the next 20 years, I might not dislike him.   But they are 16 months old.  So I worry.  When I dropped The Kid off ...

Our adoption is almost complete.  We had our last required visit with the social worker last week and now we wait for our final day in court.  Part of the process in Wayne County, Michigan is to write a letter to the court, stating that the child has bonded with our family and we would like to have her as our daughter. There is no standard form for the letter, only the requirements that we state her birth name, date of birth and, if you are changing the child's name, what the name should be on the amended birth certificate.   As I was writing, my mind started racing to all of the little things she does that melt my heart.  When she's particularly happy, she will pat my shoulder approvingly.  She's always liked cuddling, but the best is when she sits on my lap, wraps her little arms around my chest and squeezes like she's afraid she'll never get to squeeze me again.  When she started daycare, I was careful the first few months when I went to pick...